


Eat a bath bomb

by ArabellaTurner



Category: Dear Evan Hansen - Pasek & Paul/Levenson
Genre: Bad Decisions, Fluff, Jared Kleinman Eats Bath Bombs, Jared Kleinman Tries, Light Angst, Memes, Post-Canon, Texting, This is actually a real story, but for good reasons, memes taken seriously
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-04
Updated: 2019-03-04
Packaged: 2019-11-09 03:34:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,458
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17994086
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ArabellaTurner/pseuds/ArabellaTurner
Summary: It’s two summers after senior year and Jared and Evan are friends again. Jared has taken on a job at LUSH to help pay for college and Evan finds out about it. Unfortunately, even the best intentions don't always go as planned.





	Eat a bath bomb

EVAN:  
Hey, Jared? Where did you say you were working again?

JARED:  
I’m working at LUSH the soap store

EVAN:  
Eat a bath bomb

JARED:  
I already have  
I’m eating one rn actually  
Love the cronch

EVAN:  
Good lord Jared!

JARED:  
You want to try one?  
They make an excellent snack

EVAN:  
I prefer not getting poisoned, thank you very much!

JARED:  
Hey! You suggested I try it first!  
Are you trying to kill me? 

EVAN:  
Clearly

JARED:  
Thanks...  
I appreciate that...

EVAN:  
Don’t worry. It’s just because you have such a dirty mouth  
You need to constantly eat soap to clean it!

JARED:  
Fuck you, you fucking asshole! I do fucking not have a fucking dirty mouth you fucking piece of shit. Motherfucking cock sucker!

EVAN:  
...

JARED:  
angel.gif

EVAN:  
eyeroll.gif

JARED:  
So why did you want to know where I’m working anyways?  
You want to come and see me?  
eyebrowWiggle.gif

EVAN:  
gag.gif  
I just wanted to know what store has been forever tainted

JARED:  
Wow!  
Rude!  
You know you love me

EVAN:  
Sure...  
Love...  
Let’s go with that...

JARED:  
Rude!

Jared waited a few minutes for a reply, but none came. His message had a read receipt on it, so he knew that Evan had seen it. A few minutes quickly turned into twenty and Jared realized that there wasn’t going to be another message. 

Evan was only joking right? They were friends now, weren’t they? Jared knew he hadn’t been a great friend before, but they had talked and made up. Evan would never reach out just to give him a taste of his own medicine, right? He felt a little sick. Did Evan really just want to know where he worked so he could avoid him?

Jared attempted to distract himself by actually doing work. As he was restocking, he picked up a bath bomb and examined it. Obviously he had been kidding when he told Evan he was eating one, but now he wondered if pictures of him actually eating one would restart their conversation.

Taking a deep breath, he bit down on it. He regretted it instantly. The bomb was tropical scented, but it tasted like death. He jumped up to run to the back to wash his mouth out and crashed directly into someone running into the store, causing him to fall to the floor.

“Good god Jared, I thought you were joking about eating that!” he heard a horrified voice cry out. Looking up, he saw a highly concerned Evan staring down at him.

“Sorry to leave you on read,” Evan apologized. “I wanted to stop by to visit you after my shift, but my phone died mid-conversation then I got held up by my manager.” Jared looked meekly up at Evan. If he had not completely overreacted for literally a few more minutes, his mouth wouldn’t currently be filled with fizzy soap.

“I wanted to send you pictures of me actually eating one,” Jared admitted. “Please don’t. I really don’t want your pained face immortalized in a picture. You look rabid right now with all that foam coming out of your mouth.” 

“It’s absolutely disgusting,” Jared admitted. “No really?” Evan snorted, giving Jared a look. “Want a bite?” Jared asked, holding the ball up and giving Evan a weak smile.

Evan looked down at it. No, obviously he did not want a bite. But he also didn’t want Jared to be the only idiot sitting there with soap coming out of his mouth. Picking the ball up, Evan carefully examined the bite mark. It was clear that Jared let him take it because he thought that was all he planned on doing.

Before Jared could stop him, Evan quickly brought the ball up to his mouth and bit down. The sound of his gagging mixed with the sound of Jared’s protests. “What the fuck did you do that for? I just told you it was disgusting!” 

Evan laughed. “I just wanted to show you what your face looked like.” Jared looked at him incredulously. “And that was the best way you could think to do it?” “Would you want a picture of me looking this way?” Evan asked. “No,” Jared admitted. They smiled at each other.

“There’s a sink in the back where we can wash our mouths out. Come on,” Jared said, standing up and motioning for Evan to follow him.

A few minutes later, they had managed to wash the flavor out of their mouths. Jared dissolved the rest of the bath bomb to hide the evidence then went back out into the main area. He was glad that his only other coworker there right now really didn’t give a shit about anything. Had his manager been there, he probably would have been fired for a stunt like that.

Heading to the register with Evan, he took his friend’s phone and plugged it into the charger sitting back there. He was glad that it was one of those multi-port types since his coworker was already using the lightening port and Evan’s weird off-brand cell phone used a different one.

“Well, now you’re captive here for a little bit if you want to actually have any charge. Want to help me restock?” “only if you don’t eat any more of the merchandise!” Jared heard a snicker from behind the register. “Is that what all that screaming was about? Fucking hell Jared, I wish I had come over to see it!” Well, apparently she did care about a few things. “Now I’m sad Evan didn’t let me take any pictures!” Jared said with a laugh.

It was a pretty slow day in the mall and not a super busy hour, so Jared only had to help a few people while Evan was there with him. The rest of the time, they just admired all the different scents or “flavors,” as Jared started calling them.

“I swear to god Jared, if you try to eat anything else, I am never speaking to you again!” Evan protested as Jared pointed out yet another “delicious sounding flavor.” Jared laughed. “Don’t worry, Ev. I have no intention of torturing myself like that again, even without the threat of losing my best friend!” Evan snorted and lightly shoved Jared. “Good. Torturing yourself is typically a bad thing,” he replied. Jared wiggled his eyebrows. “Typically, eh? Kinky!” Evan laughed and shoved Jared again. “Oh shut up,” he grumbled with a smile. 

Evan then turned back to face his friend. “For the record, I won’t actually leave you if you did eat another one, just judge you for the rest of forever.” Jared smiled at him. “I know, Evan,” he replied. Evan smiled back. “Just thought I should make sure!” The two boys grinned at each other until another customer came in and Jared’s attentions were diverted. 

Evan decided to leave about an hour later, but he promised he would stop by to annoy Jared again from time to time. “You better!” Jared insisted. “If I get too lonely again, I might make more bad decisions!”

Evan stopped in his tracks, a few feet away from the door and turned back to face Jared. “Is that why you ate the bath bomb? You were upset I just left the conversation hanging?” Jared looked down, embarrassed. “You know that I would never purposefully do something like that to you, right?” Jared only looked more embarrassed.

“You’re my friend, Jare. I would never do something to hurt you.” “I know,” Jared agreed. “That’s why I feel bad. You would never do something like that, but I used to do it to you, so I just assumed.” Evan smiled sadly at his friend. “Well, you aren’t like that anymore. Our past is in our past and we can’t change it. I’m not going to let our old mistakes get in the way of our current happiness. I know that you would never do something like that to me now, so I don’t need to worry. Let’s just enjoy our friendship as it is now, okay?”

Jared grinned at Evan. “Okay,” he agreed. “I’m really glad I have you back again. I missed you so much after we fell out. Just please know that you are the only person for whom I would eat a bath bomb!” Evan laughed. “Same to you, Jare Bear! Same to you!” They both cracked up at Evan’s choice of nicknames. 

They bid each other farewell with a hug then waved goodbye. Fifteen minutes later, a rather embarrassed Evan returned to pick up his phone from behind the register. 

That evening they texted for a couple of hours. Whoever would have guessed that eating bath bombs could be such a cathartic experience?

**Author's Note:**

> I discovered that short and fluffy can be pretty fun, but I’m pretty sure I’m always going to make my poor Jared suffer a little. I hope you liked my little story!


End file.
